torn

discovered Art House today.
yesh i'm such an ignorant newb -,-'"
my friend was performing at earshot cafe sat evening, so i dropped by to lend my support, and to enjoy an evening. and enjoy i did ^_^
i'm a fan of Imperfect Original (ImO) =D well, that's my friend's band, so if you get wind of that name, recall this post: that i like their music, and it's worth your time to drop by and listen :)
i went there alone. my friend had her friends, her band member had her friends, but i was alone. was nice. juz chilling. i should do that more often.
it's silly i noe, but the reason for the title of this post is that i'm living a contradiction. i want to be alone, but i want to be alone WITH somebody. silly huh? yeah.. i'm a living contradiction.
went shopping at kino today too after the evening's performance was done. remembered now y i love bookstores like page one and kino, and remembered that i still hate crowds. yeah. bookstores like those are paradise.

so. back to being torn. oh wait, i DID buy stuff from kino btw :) ok out of point. i'm neither a genius nor an idiot. i'm neither a loner or a socialite. i'm neither shy nor bold. i'm neither meticulous nor reckless. i'm.. torn? (no reference to "lying naked on the floor" as was in the lyrics of Torn by Natalie Imbruglia =p)
and in being torn, i find myself an individual, all alone, without a captain (nor needing one), without a partner. yes i'm jealous, and yet nonchalent, about others finding their other half. maybe i'm resigned to never finding one. i've never really been able to find anyone who consistently connects with me on any level beyond superficiality.
like i said, i'm a chameleon. if i can barely find myself, how can i find someone who'd wanna be my companion through life? it'd boogles the mind..

heck. lets talk about something random. lets review a few age-old sayings, and how they make sense in the modern world. lets start with the following train of thought:
"The intellectual world today can be divided into the following 2 schools of thought; 1) the Arts 2) Science. Neither field is independent of one another, with overlapping areas, grey/blind spots, and some topics of discussion which transcends the a/m division."
By Art, I refer to mediums of rationalisation like religion and philosophy, and Science, mathematics, logic, physics and such others.
If you still follow my train of thought, let me delve deeper, but not by much =p The difference between the 2 schools is: The Arts asks questions, and in return, poses more questions. Science asks questions, seeks answers, which in return sprouts more questions. In summary, both schools have a return of more questions, but Science gets the bonus of having answers too.

Now, what does this have to do with age-old sayings? the 1st i'd like to bring to attention is "ignorance is bliss". is it not true, that of the 2 schools, the Arts are stereotyped as being more fun, creative, even enjoyable, happy? do you not enjoy music? do you not seek a state of bliss in religion? on the contrary, Science, though possessing more knowledge than the Arts, isn't fairing better. and not just because it's stereotyped as dull. never boring, just dull.
in seeking answers, Science has neither quenched it's insatiable thirst for knowledge nor satisfy the hunger of human curiosity. which brings us to our 2nd saying.
"curiosity kills the cat".
funny, that with increasing knowledge and technology of the world around us, we're faced with the ever-increasing probability of human extinction, a dying earth, or at least, the death of the world as we know today. we're the cat, and curiosity will be the death of us.

so. what's the point in all this?
there isn't any really. i just think.. nah. no point thinking. *meow*

p.s. heck.. talk about torn. Silentstalkr's guild (the one i started) is Halfway House. HA. how apt for me, the guy who's always stuck in the middle.